This animation introduces concepts that are key to understanding traumatic bereavement. It communicates evidence-based information from the UK Trauma Council, sharing current understanding of the impact of traumatic bereavement on children and young people.

The impact of traumatic bereavement on children and young people

How is traumatic bereavement different to more typical grief?

Children and young people, like adults, can experience a broad range of emotions when grieving. Although they can be intense and difficult to manage at times, typically the emotions do not impact everyday life persistently.

Young people often grieve in puddles, dipping in and out of their grief, experiencing strong feelings and then going off to do their usual things in between.

For most children and young people, as they come to understand the death of someone close to them and how they feel about it, the intensity and frequency of difficult emotions reduce and they learn to live with their loss.

In traumatic bereavement, children and young people experience very strong emotions because of the meaning they make of the death. Feelings such as fear, anxiety, guilt, anger or shame block their ability to grieve and adapt to their loss. This often comes with upsetting and overwhelming images, thoughts, and sensations which appear in their minds and bodies in a way that feels out of their control. This can result in difficulties in behaviour and relationships which impact everyday life persistently, in school as well as elsewhere.

The grief becomes more like a well than a puddle and much harder to step out of.

These metaphors and descriptions can help us to notice how a child or young person is responding after a death as we try to identify traumatic bereavement. However, these are not completely distinct categories and developing an understanding of the child or young person’s individual response will take time.

Do the circumstances of the death lead to traumatic bereavement?

Circumstances such as a sudden or violent death or death by suicide can increase the likelihood of traumatic bereavement.

Research tells us that restrictions such as those imposed during the coronavirus pandemic can make a bereavement more likely to be traumatic, for example, not being able to say goodbye or attend a funeral.

In situations like a pandemic, where there may be a great deal of uncertainty, it can be more difficult for a child or young person to make sense of a death and for the adults around them to give them accurate information. Research also tells us that if a child is not given the facts about a death, they may ‘fill in’ the missing information by imagining what happened. Without the facts, it is more likely that the meaning the child or young person makes of the death will be confusing or frightening and they are more likely to experience the death as traumatic.

Do previous experiences make it more likely that a bereavement will be traumatic?

Some prior experiences may make it more likely a child will experience a bereavement as traumatic. These include:

However, it is important to remember that some children and young people in these circumstances or with these previous experiences will not experience a bereavement as traumatic. Similarly, some children and young people with none of these experiences, will experience a bereavement as traumatic.

Children and young people who have been traumatically bereaved need additional support to process the trauma of the death. 

Information provided by the UK Trauma Council. For information and resources about how to support a young person suffering a traumatic bereavement see the UKTC website HERE