*Training by ListeningPeople Training for youth leaders, teachers and professionals supporting young people. Expand ListeningPeople training and resources provide tools for teachers, youth workers, counsellors and anyone who works with young people to safely and confidently enable them to engage around the difficult topic of loss. Our training is led by Pete English. With over 25 years experience in working with young people and counselling in schools, Pete really does know what is like to support young people through difficult times. He is currently providing training on-line. On any of his workshops you will come away with tools to go away and use straight away, a heightened sense of the impact of hearing about loss on self and a whole host of new ideas! You can download our training leaflet from the box below. To find out when the next online workshops will be happening go to TRAINING Endorsements by professionals who have experienced ListeningPeople training: "What Pete doesn't know about young people and loss isn't worth knowing." Rachel Gardner, Youthscape "The training was professional, insightful and perfectly pitched for our setting." Joe Lowther, Kick London "I hadn’t expected to be putting this into practice so soon. Just had a phone call from our local church primary head teacher, a parent has taken her own life. Have you got any immediate pointers as to how we might practically support the school on Monday morning when this is such devastating, raw news for staff and children?" Pete advised this attendee by email. “Pete delivered the training in a way that enabled everyone in the room from very different professional and personal backgrounds to participate in it fully. He was calm and professional and gained people’s trust speedily through his knowledge and manner. He presented the material clearly and ensured that we understood it. There was a good balance of practical exercises and slides/written material.I would recommend Pete as a trainer/facilitator." Antonia Rowland, Volunteer at Number 72, Sudbury - Solicitor (SRA number 29891)"The whole area of loss and bereavement raises many sensitive issues and Pete quickly created a supportive and respectful learning environment in which to share and participate. He also brings with him a wealth of experience in small groups, mentoring and counselling which enrich the training. He placed the young person’s needs at the centre of the discussions, a great listener and generous in sharing resources, which promotes good practice and development for facilitators." Ant Cartwight, Senior Youthwork Coordinator Thanks so much! Great session again, so much amazing information and practical help. Can't thank you enough. Absolutely invaluable training. Kay Wilkinson - Youth Angels Coordinator. Download printed details about ListeningPeople training ListeningPeople_DL_AtaLoss_web.pdf
..Tough Stuff Journal: Someone has died A resource to help young people express and share their grief and feelings of loss when someone has died - endorsed by professionals in the field. Expand This is the latest member of the Tough Stuff Journal family - Someone has Died. This is aimed at supporting young people wrestling with the loss of someone close. The journal is designed to be used by a young person accompanied by a trusted adult - a parent or relative, youth worker, social worker or school mentor. The journal is designed deliberately in 'free form', can be written in and asks open questions to encourage the young person to reflect on and record their feelings about the loss. Purchase Price £5 + postage Available to order from our Online Shop The Tough Stuff journals have come into existence as a result of Pete’s work with young people over many years. Many of the ideas are credited to young people who he has worked alongside. Pete has worked with talented designers and illustrators to come up with the Tough Stuff journal - great resource which children and young people will want to pick up and work through with their teacher, a parent or counsellor. Julie Stokes OBE, founder of childhood bereavement charity, Winston’s Wish and author herself, expressed her appreciation of this resource saying; These booklets are deceptively difficult to write and I love the simplicity of your clear affinity to young people. I say this, Pete, having literally just finished a non fiction book for children and young people myself.
.Loss and Hope WEBSITE: Resources to equip churches of all denominations across the UK to help those grieving. Expand Loss and Hope is a coalition of Christian organisations seeking to help the Church support the bereaved – currently equipping churches across the UK to run The Bereavement Journey for those grieving in our nation. To discover where Churches are participating, click HERE WESBITE LINK Email: [email protected]
.Tough Stuff Journal: Parents Splitting Up A resource to help young people express and share their emotions and feelings of loss when parents separate Expand The first in our Tough Stuff Journal series, Pete English has produced a booklet for young people who are struggling with parental break up. For many young people this involves feelings of traumatic loss accompanied by emotions which are hard to handle. The journal is designed to be used by a young person accompanied by a trusted adult - a parent or relative, youth worker, social worker or school mentor. It is deliberately ‘free form’ and non- prescriptive in the way in which it can be completed, but has some guidelines at the back. It is useful for parents, youth workers, teachers or anyone working with young people. Purchase Price £5 + postage Available from our Online Shop 'Tough Stuff Journal: Someone has died' will be published shortly. This is specifically for young people who have been bereaved.
10 Ways to help you through the seasons (Autumn) WEBSITE: Bereavement UK'S practical guide to helping the bereaved deal with the seasons and anniversaries Expand Changing of any season can bring with it new anniversaries of significant moments. Here are some ways that may help you through autumn. Visit site
4Louis TRAINING, RESOURCES: 4louis provide useful tools, equipment and training free of charge to hospital units, hospices and other professionals comforting grieving families who suffer a miscarriage, stillbirth neonatal or child death. Expand 4Louis provides memory boxes, bereavement rooms, photography equipment, burial beds, Moses baskets & Angel pockets, cuddle cots and blankets and training free of charge to professionals working with grieving families who have lost a baby or young child. WEBSITE LINK Contact: Email: [email protected] Telephone: (0191)514 4473 4Louis, 36B Pallion Industrial Estate, European Way, Sunderland SR4 6SN
A birthday present for Daniel by Juliet Rothman BOOK: Ellen has lost her brother, and she shares with readers just how his death has changed the way her family interacts and the way she thinks about herself and others. Expand This sensitive book is designed to generate discussion between children and adults as each page provides opportunities for communication, understanding, expression of feelings, and support from the little girl's parents.As the story moves through young Ellen's experiences, it arrives at a universal problem how to commemorate the birthday of the child who has died. The suggestions presented here have been highly recognized and recommended by bereavement counsellors and support groups. Although written for the young child, A Birthday Present for Daniel reaches out to all who have experienced the loss of a loved one.Juliet C. Rothman of Annapolis, MD, is assistant professor at the National Catholic School for Social Services, Catholic University of America, editor of the Healthcare Ethics book series, and author of Saying Goodbye to Daniel. BUY ON AMAZON
A death in the lives of FILM: 20 minute film shows a group of young people aged 13-16, from a range of backgrounds talking about the kind of support they needed to help them cope with bereavement. Expand Made with the help of the St Christopher's Candle Project, shows a group of young people aged 13-16, from a range of backgrounds talking about the kind of support they needed to help them cope with bereavement. They discuss the role of family, friends, schools and other service providers such as the police, doctors and nurses. BUY HERE
A Shelter for Sadness BOOK: Children's book exploring the importance of grief. Expand Children are experiencing sadness to a far greater degree than is usual but how can they best manage that and how can they describe it? Anne Booth’s gentle text explores how a little boy creates a shelter for his sadness giving it a place where it can take on the many different shapes and moods it may arrive in. Having a safe place where he can engage with the sadness helps the boy to deal with the wide range of moods it may release in him. It also helps him to prepare for a time when he and the sadness may no longer need a shelter but can step out together into a better world. Inspired by the words of Holocaust survivor Etty Hillesum, A Shelter for Sadness is rich in emotion all of which is beautifully realised in David Litchfield’s illustrations. Buy on AMAZON
A Valley Journal Resources through blogs, articles and books on grief and how to handle it. WEBSITE: Living with loss grief resources. A useful website curated by Abi May. Expand A Valley Journal Resources through blogs, articles and books on grief and how to handle it. Visit the website
ABSCo WEBSITE Association of Bereavement Services Coordinators in Hospices and Palliative Care Expand ABSCo was formed to meet the need for a network for support and information for people who coordinate and manage bereavement support services within hospices and palliative care settings, for both adults and children. As one of the founding members of the National Bereavement Alliance, ABSCo works at all levels to raise public awareness of bereavement issues, and to provide a network of support to those working in the bereavement field in Hospice and Palliative care settings nationwide. WEBSITE LINK For general enquires, please contact ABSCo's administrator, Lesley: [email protected]
Action on Pre-eclampsia WEBSITE: Charity campaigning for support and providing information for those affected by Pre-eclampsia. Expand A national charity which campaigns and lobbies for funds, research and education to support those affected by Pre-eclampsia. WEBSITE LINK [email protected] 01386 761848
Activities for bereaved young people BOOK: helping to develop resilience and coping skills. Expand New for 2020, this spiral-bound A4 book provides practitioners, such as teachers and youth leaders, with a framework of activities to engage bereaved young people, get them thinking and talking, and help them to develop resilience and coping skills. 1 in 30 young people will be bereaved of a parent before the age of 16, and this book will help practitioners supporting young people to feel confident in addressing bereavement issues. Suitable for working with young people aged 8 - 18. 100 pages, detailing 20 activity session plans, some with photocopiable resource sheets. Also covers useful theories, guidance and further reading for practitioners ORDER HERE
Activities for families to do together after the death of a loved one LEAFLET: Ideas and activities for families after a bereavement. Produced by Balloons Charity. Expand Families who can share grief and undertake activities together to adjust to a new environment without the deceased often have better outcomes. Download from Balloons HERE
After a suicide - Scotland BOOKLET: guide to practical and emotional support following a bereavement by suicide Expand This guide to practical and emotional support following a bereavement by suicide has been produced by the Scottish Association for Mental Health (SAMH) to help support and signpost individuals bereaved by suicide. This can be downloaded from the Support After Suicide Partnership website HERE
After suicide - following the suicide of a child BOOKLET: Provides practical and emotional support following the suicide of a child Expand This leaflet, by The Compassionate Friends, provides practical and emotional support following the suicide of a child. Topics looked at include: - The Early days - Funeral and memorial service - The inquest - The impact on the family - Talking to children - Surviving This can be downloaded from the Support After Suicide Partnership HERE
Alan D. Wolfelt, Healing your Grieving Heart – For Teens BOOK: A book of simple tips for understanding and expressing your grief for teens Expand Buy on Amazon With sensitivity and insight, this series offers suggestions for healing activities that can help survivors learn to express their grief and mourn naturally. Acknowledging that death is a painful, ongoing part of life, they explain how people need to slow down, turn inward, embrace their feelings of loss, and seek and accept support when a loved one dies. Each book, geared for mourning adults, teens, or children, provides ideas and action-oriented tips that teach the basic principles of grief and healing. These ideas and activities are aimed at reducing the confusion, anxiety, and huge personal void so that the living can begin their lives again. Included in the books for teens and kids are age-appropriate activities that teach younger people that their thoughts are not only normal but necessary.
Albert Y. Hsu, Grieving a Suicide: A Loved One's Search for Comfort, Answers, and Hope BOOK: Hsu's book draws on the Christian faith to assist suicide survivors to the God who offers comfort in our grief. Expand Hsu draws on the Christian faith to assist suicide survivors to the God who offers comfort in our grief. Buy on Amazon "Albert," the neighbor said, "your mom needs you to come home." That's how it began for Albert Hsu when his father died. Anyone who has lost a loved one to suicide experiences tremendous shock and trauma. What follows is a confusing mix of emotions--anger, guilt, grief, and despair. Suicide raises heartrending questions: Why did this happen? Why didn't we see it coming? Could we have done anything to prevent it? How can we go on? Many also wonder if those who choose suicide are doomed to an eternity separated from God and their loved ones. Some may even start asking whether life is worth living at all. After his father's death, Hsu wrestled with the intense emotional and theological questions surrounding suicide. While acknowledging that there are no easy answers, he draws on the resources of the Christian faith to point suicide survivors to the God who offers comfort in our grief and hope for the future. For those who have lost a loved one to suicide and for their counsellors and pastors, this book is an essential companion for the journey toward healing. This revised edition incorporates updated statistics and now includes a discussion guide for suicide survivor groups.
Alison Wertheimer, A Special Scar: The Experiences of People Bereaved by Suicide BOOK: A 'Special Scar' looks in detail at the stigma surrounding suicide and offers practical help for survivors, relatives and friends of people who have taken their own life. Expand Buy on Amazon Every 85 minutes someone in the UK takes their own life, but what happens to those left behind? In a society where suicide is often viewed with fear or disapproval, it can be difficult for those personally affected by a suicide death to come to terms with their loss and seek help and support. A Special Scar looks in detail at the stigma surrounding suicide and offers practical help for survivors, relatives and friends of people who have taken their own life. Fifty bereaved people tell their own stories, showing us that, by not hiding the truth from themselves and others, they have been able to learn to live with the suicide, offering hope to others facing this traumatic loss. This new, revised edition includes new material on: * counselling survivors of suicide* group work with survivors. The new material incorporates the latest research findings which have added significantly to our understanding of the impact of suicide, an area which the UK Government has targeted for action in the mental health arena. This new edition will continue to be an invaluable resource for survivors of suicide as well as for all those who are in contact with them, including police and coroner's officers, bereavement services, self-help organisations for survivors, mental health professionals, social workers, GPs, counsellors and therapists.Alison Wertheimer has been working as a freelance writer and researcher since 1987, after working in the voluntary sector for twenty years. She has a private counselling practice, is a supervisor with a bereavement counselling service and runs workshops on the impact of suicide bereavement.
Al-Suyuti J. The Virtue of Remaining Steadfast When Losing a Child BOOK: The Virtue of Remaining Steadfast When Losing a Child is a compendium of consolations found in the earliest texts of Islam, the great majority of them attributed to the Messenger of Allah himself. Expand Few trials are as intense as the pain of losing a child: we are left bewildered, sometimes angry, and our most fundamental beliefs may be challenged. The Virtue of Remaining Steadfast When Losing a Child is a compendium of consolations found in the earliest texts of Islam, the great majority of them attributed to the Messenger of Allah himself. The author says "The devoted reader will learn how this uniquely painful suffering can be the occasion of reward by the Most Merciful, and a means of drawing nearer to Him and His Blessed Prophet. It is also hoped the book will serve as a useful reference work for; Imams, Hospital Workers and others with professional responsibilities." The translator has included an in-depth research of Imam al-Suyuti's biography in the book. Mufti Zaid Haspatel, a senior lecturer from Dar al-Uloom Zakariyya (South Africa) translated the book using four manuscripts. It is a translation of Imam Suyutis book with additional notes, index and an introduction. This is the first book on the topic in the English language. Al-Suyuti was orphaned at an early age, and during the course of his life also lost a son, a daughter and his wife, which may have prompted him to write this book. The translator has also tasted the pain of which it speaks. BUY ON AMAZON
Always and Forever by Alan Durant BOOK: Helps children process grief Expand When Fox dies the rest of his family are absolutely distraught. How will Mole, Otter and Hare go on without their beloved friend? But, months later, Squirrel reminds them all of how funny Fox used to be, and they realise that Fox is still there in their hearts and memories. BUY ON AMAZON
An expert's guide on how to talk to children about death. WEBPAGE: The guide details the best way to approach the subject of death with children. Expand The guide details the best way to approach the subject of death with children, the words and phrases you should and shouldn't use and how a child may react to the topic of death. This guide also features expert advice from clinical psychologist Dr Marianne Trent and from Carole Henderson, the Managing Director at Grief UK. The guide is hosted on the Memorials of Distinction website (see link below). CLICK HERE
Anita Diamant, Saying Kiddish: How to comfort the dying, bury the dead and mourn as a Jew BOOK: A book that helps move one through grief according to Judaism’s beliefs and customs in layman’s terms. Expand This is a fairly detailed book with regards to the path of mourning from the point of death to Yahrseits (remembrance on the anniversary of the death) with regards to Jewish tradition. Though I have been getting in touch with my Judaism over the past year and attending shul regularly, when my grandmother suddenly passed away I found myself asking many questions. Going to shabbat services is great for embracing Judaism for everyday life, but there are many things about the Jewish tradition associated with death, especially of a family member, that you just don't get exposed to normally. This book was a wonderful guidance in the days following my grandmother's death and for weeks afterwards, as I embraced what my culture traditionally did and remembering that I am just one person; while many people have passed away before, and many still will, death and healing are very raw and critical part of life and not something to hide from. Buy on Amazon
Anna Blundy, Every Time We Say Goodbye BOOK: Anna Blundy's book is an honest account of her personal experience of losing her father. Expand (Arrow Books Ltd, 1999) - death of an absent father Anna Blundy's honest account of her personal experience of losing her father. Buy on Amazon On 17th November 1989 Anna Blundy received a phone call to say that her father, David Blundy, a foreign correspondent, had been shot reporting the war in El Salvador. In a way it was the phone call she had been expecting all her life. Every time they said goodbye, she knew he might not return. Eight years later, in April 1997, Anna went to El Salvador to try to discover the truth about his death, and finally, after a decade of mourning, to come to terms with her loss. During her trip Anna, now a journalist herself, revisits her childhood and the world she and her father inhabited. Memories of the succession of lonely hotel bedrooms in exotic locations, the painful goodbyes, and the midnight phone calls sometimes punctuated by the sound of gunfire. Every time she turned on the TV she imagined news of his death in some dusty foreign war. This is also an honest insight into the relationship between father and daughter - her fear of not fulfilling his expectations; of being supplanted by a new girlfriend or by the birth of a younger sister; of how her world collapsed the day when he died. This is a sharp but beautifully written account interweaving humour and bittersweet recollection.